The Return of Dumb Fuck

Posted by: dballing | September 25, 2003

The Return of Dumb Fuck

10:45pm
*ring*
DB: Hello?
DF: Woodstock Taxi?
DB: (Looks at Caller ID, recognizes it from the other day) Fucking ‘ell lady, this isn’t Woodstock Taxi!
*click*
11:10pm
*ring*
(Looks at Caller ID)
DB: THIS IS NOT THE GODDAMN CAB COMPANY!!!
*click*
It’s funny, too, because I always give the Caller ID a second look, because Dumb Fuck’s name is “Sharon Schneider” (and, obviously, I was married to someone with a very similar name, so I always double-check to make sure I’m not about to scream at the ex when I pick up the phone).
So, since Dumb Fuck didn’t learn her lesson the first time, I’m open to suggestions on how to handle it if she persists in calling here looking for a cab company. This time, she got her name published. Maybe next time she does it, I’ll publish her phone number. Then you can all call her from all over the country/world and ask for a cab.

Posted in Sharon Schneider - Dumb Fuck

Responses

I don’t even get it – I know both phone numbers, and they aren’t even close. This isn’t even a situation where they are a couple of digits off either – not a single one of the 7 digits even matches. Your name for her is the best description possible.
By: Mark on September 25, 2003
at 11:21 pm
I can relate.
By: Rob on September 25, 2003
at 11:27 pm
I say next time she calls, pick her up and drop her off in the middle of the ghetto or something.
That would be some comedy.
By: Rob on September 25, 2003
at 11:36 pm
Two Ways.
One, ask her what number she is dialing. Then politely tell her what she’s doing wrong and make an old lady happy.
Two, tell her that because of the war in Iraq and increaseing gas prices, we’ve had to “slightly” increase our fares. To get her presrciptions now will cost $312.96 per trip. Plus tip.
By: Brian on September 25, 2003
at 11:56 pm
She’s not an old lady.. she sounds about 20ish.
By: Derek on September 26, 2003
at 12:01 am
simple: next time she calls, answer “yes, it is”, take her request, tell her you’ll send a cab, and then go back to sleep.
Repeat until she’s so pissed at your stupid cab company that she vows to never use them again and goes and annoys some other poor slob.
(if she calls to complain about being stiffed, apologize, offer to transfer her to the owner of the company, and then hang up. Repeat as necessary)
By: chuqui on September 26, 2003
at 12:30 am
you’re REAL hope here, by the way, is to piss her off so badly she calls the local TV station consumer action line to complain, so that THEY can find out she’s been calling the wrong number all along and explain it to her…
heh
By: chuqui on September 26, 2003
at 12:32 am
Don’t answer when she calls?
By: Jeremy Zawodny on September 26, 2003
at 12:43 am
Usually when I get a repeat phone call from a bozo I’ll answer “Hello, 120 precinct, this is officer :insert any name: how can I help you?” They usually hang up, and don’t call back.
By: Lynne on September 26, 2003
at 9:26 am
If she’s 20ish, get her address, drive over, pick her up, and take her out to dinner! What’s the worst thing that could happen?
By: Curtis Interruptus on September 26, 2003
at 9:48 am
‘If she’s 20ish, get her address, drive over, pick her up, and take her out to dinner! What’s the worst thing that could happen?’
eh, you’d be dating a moron?
By: Justin on September 26, 2003
at 1:08 pm
plus she sounds kind of like white trash. i mean, who calls a cab company to go pick up medicine at a pharmacy for them? that sounds totally hillbilly to me.
By: brandt on September 26, 2003
at 2:04 pm
that sounds totally hillbilly to me.
Or totally disabled. I mean, for all we know this lady could be a quadraplegic.
By: Brian on September 26, 2003
at 3:43 pm
What’s a girl gotta do to get a date? Pretend that she can’t figure out how to pump gas?
By: Curtis Interruptus on September 27, 2003
at 11:44 am

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