More From The Moron Cable Company

As I was wandering around my apartment today, I realized, "Hey, you haven't heard back from Time-Warner Cable yet!" ... so I checked my HD box, and lo and behold, 705 was still dark.

CSR: Thank you for calling Time Warner, this is Valerie, how can I help you?
DB: You see the notes on my account from my call yesterday?
CSR: I see something about you being unhappy.
DB: So on Saturday, I called in a complaint about not having channel 705. I used to work at a cable company, so I told the rep who took the call that it looked like a head-end problem since it was only channel 705, but I'm just a dumb customer, what do I know, because she insisted it must be the box. So she scheduled a service call for yesterday to replace my obviously defective box.
CSR: Mmm-hmmmm
DB: Well, the tech came out, and swapped out my box, but gosh, channel 705 was still dark. So the tech calls up to someone in your office and says "look at channel 705 and what do you see?" ... shucky-darn if it wasn't dark at your obviously-defective box in the office, too.
CSR: Mmm-hmmmm
DB: So the tech asks the guy he's on the Nextel with -- and I want to thank you for using Nextel because it let me hear both sides of the conversation -- so he asks him, "Did you tell $NAME there was a problem at the head-end?" and he comes back, no lie, with "Yeah, but he didn't seem to care."
CSR: Mmm-hmmmm
DB: So I called yesterday, to explain my anger at not only being treated like a moron who had no clue, but to vent about how the guy in charge of the head-end didn't care, and was told I would get a call this morning from a supervisor.
CSR: Mmm-hmmmmm
DB: Yeah, well it's 2 p.m., and no call.
CSR: OK
DB: So not only was I treated like a moron, not only did the head-end supervisor not care that there was a customer-effecting problem, but the supervisor for customer-service who is supposed to be in charge of making things "right" couldn't be bothered to call me back either.
CSR: Can I put you on hold for a moment?
DB: You sure can.
(*hold*)
CSR: OK, I have tried to get you a supervisor, but I'm afraid they're all busy at the moment.
DB: Great, so nobody cares at the head-end, literally, and the customer service supervisors can't be bothered to make them give me the service I'm paying for.
CSR: Well, the most I can do is to take a message and have a supervisor call you back.
DB: That's what they told me yesterday, and it was clearly a lie. Why should I believe that will happen today?
CSR: The reason you haven't gotten a call back yet today is that the supervisors have been on the phone with other customers, and haven't had a chance to call you back.
DB: We're in the seventh hour of the business day. If they can't scrape together a couple minutes to call me back in that period of time, then you're horribly understaffed.
CSR: The most I can do is take a message.
DB: Tell you what, put me on hold, explain to your supervisor that if she doesn't come take this call right now, I'm simply going to contact the Public Service Commission and let them call her, because you can bet your sweet bippy she'll take their call. I think they'll be pretty interested...after all... the "Not caring" quote is just so choice that it couldn't help but end up in the fine paperwork, don't you think?
CSR: Well, when you say "Don't care," --
DB: I mean don't care, as in those are the exact words that came out of the Nextel phone's speaker. And it's obvious he didn't care, because the channel is still to this day dark. There's been a problem in the head-end now for four days, where I've been paying for a Hi-Def channel that you guys simply willfully refuse to provide me.
CSR: OK, let me put you on hold for one second.
(*hold*)
CSR: I did get my supervisor, Cathy, to put her other call on hold, and I explained the situation to her. She indicated that she was here until 4pm, and would definitely call you back with information prior to her leaving.
DB: What is Cathy's last name?
CSR: $LAST_NAME
DB: You can explain to Cathy, if you would, that she has until 4pm. At 4:05 I go to the PSC and I let them tear you guys apart starting at the stern if you know what I'm saying.
CSR: I understand, sir.
DB: OK, have a good day. And let me tell you, as someone who used to be a CSR, you handled this really well, given the complete handcuffing you've gotten from your management. I'm not mad or upset with you at all, just so you know.
CSR: Thank you. Have a good day.
DB: You too... Bye.
(*click*)