Oh My God! They Killed Alpha-Bits! You Bastards!

Growing up, I had a quartet of cereals I used to enjoy in the mornings.... Honeycombs, Froot Loops, Apple Jacks, and Alpha-Bits. Alpha-Bits were, by far, my favorite of all. I'm a "keep my cereal crispy" kind of guy, so Froot Loops and Apple Jacks were the bottom pair because they get soggy and soft way too quickly.

The last two years, it's been increasingly hard to find Alpha-Bits, and it made me sad. I wouldn't eat them all that often, but it was nice to have a box in the apartment so that if I decided I wanted some "comfort food" on a weekend morning, it was nice to have handy.

Then, about two months ago, none of the stores that used to carry Alpha-Bits did anymore. They were selling some "marshmallow Alpha-Bits" nonsense still, which is nothing more than Lucky Charms, but the good old fashioned Alpha-Bits were gone.

Then they reappeared! I was ecstatic! I figured they'd just come off the shelf because of a re-sizing of the boxes or something like that. Only when I looked closer did I see that the word "sweetened" had come off of the boxes. I bought a box, hoping beyond hope that it was all marketing... that they were de-emphasizing the sweetening, and laying their emphasis on the oat-cereal underneath, which is nothing more than shaped Cheerios.

This morning I discovered, much to my chagrin, that the folks at Post had, in fact, destroyed my favorite sunday-morning breakfast cereal. Gone is the sweet taste I grew up with, replaced with dry tasteless crap.

Those bastards.